Is External Validation Real?

It is natural to want positive feedback, but we veer off the rails when we blindly chase it, when we do not analyze or examine it. We follow it almost impulsively, unquestioningly, to the point where our very sense of ourselves begins to depend on the feedback we get from outside. Our happiness is weak and puny because it is based on external validation. This is artificial happiness; it is not real because it is dependent on conditions and other people’s perceptions of us. It can contribute to our sense of not being good enough, our sense of insecurity, because we are placing our hopes on whether we receive praise. We no longer trust in our own opinion of ourselves independent of the feedback we get from others—our self-worth hinges on this feedback. This is when it becomes a problem. This is when the practice of cultivating equanimity toward praise or criticism becomes so important.

Excerpt From
Loving Life as It Is
Chakung Jigme Wangdrak

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